Meet me at AAC 2016!

Excited to announce that I have been accepted (along with my husband and two first mom friends) to present at American Adoption Congress 2016 Conference in Denver.

Our presentation is titled Mitigating & Managing Collateral Damage: Impact of Adoption on 1st Family. We are focusing largely on marriages and relationships for the first mother post surrender. Our goal is to get the community talking about the collateral damage of adoption – future husbands, wives, children and more. We will share personal stories and ways we managed. We will also offer suggestions for mitigating this damage for future first families.

I would love to talk to other first moms or dads about how surrendering your child affected your future relationships and marriage. If you are willing to talk, leave me a comment and I will email you and we can arrange a time to talk on the phone or chat online.

More to come on this topic as we develop our presentation.

And if you live in the Denver area and plan to attend, come to our session! My panel members include Denise of Second Chance Mother, Kathy Aderhold and my own husband (who has quite a unique perspective on how adoption affects a marriage).

Conference details for reference:

37th Annual American Adoption Congress International Conference

Trailblazing Change: Moving Mountains Together in Adoption

March 29 – April 2, 2016
Denver Grand Hyatt
1750 Welton Street in Denver, Colorado

14 Thoughts.

  1. I’m glad to see that you’re doing this. I know that both you and Denise will have much to offer to others in similar situations. And Rich, of course, is a sweetheart for coming along and sharing his unique perspective.

  2. Suz I’d really like to participate in your investigation. I feel surrender totally kicked my butt because of secrecy and shame- and sex.

    • Katrina – I will email you and we can set up a time to talk! Thank you for being willing to share.

  3. **raising hand**
    Me!! My “birth”daughter is 30…adoption was opened when she was 8. I married her “birth”father when she was almost 2 and we had our first son. (yep, another out of wedlock pregnancy hoping to make right the “wrong” we did in relinquishing our daughter) We went on to have 6 more kids…4 boys followed by 2 girls. Despite the adoption being open and having at least yearly several-day-long visits for 10 years, there is no relationship between our daughter and our “kept” kids. There is particularly animosity between “birth”daughter and first born “kept” daughter. I have lots more to say! Oh, I’ve been diagnosed twice with PTSD, endured a near divorce 15 years ago, terrible relationships with my parents (who forced the adoption), and went for 25 years without any of us speaking to my husband’s parents. Overall, relinquishment destroyed our whole family.


  4. I have a 27 year old birth son and am married with 3 daughters, 20, 18, and 8. I have had “weird” experiences in mothering my first child and would like to talk to you about it.

  5. I am a birthmother in open afoptipn. Placed 21 yrs ago. Married and parenting. From Nebraska. Interested in contributing

  6. I’d love to share my story with you. I had an open adoption in college. I later married and had two more daughters. It effected my relationships with daughters and husband. I’d love to share to help others.

  7. I’d love to participate. I lost my son to adoption in 1962. I married one year later and had three other children. However, I never forgot him and had many tearful days and nights. I never told my husband until 2001 when I decided to search for my son. We were reunited in March of that year. We continue to keep in touch and I love having him in my life.

  8. I discovered your blog today and am really enjoying your writing. am a birthmother and willing to share my experience with you.

    • HI there! Thanks for your comment and your intersest. The conference is in the Spring and I am a bit behind in my interviews. If you left me a real email address at the time you did your comment, I will contact you! Thank you.

  9. Pingback: Collateral Damage Conversation | Writing My Wrongs

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