The Maze of Adoption Trauma

I asked, specifically, for one special photo to be taken by my wedding photographer. It is a shot that was suggested to me some time ago by my friends at  While their suggestion did not include the fabulous backdrop of the Chicago skyline (taken from the lake side) my addition of it only deepened the meaning.

The photo below is my back with my Man in the Maze tattoo on my back. The man in the maze is the logo/icon for the and represents many things to me – all of them adoption related.

I got this tattoo a few years back, much to the chagrine of many who know me. Why would you do that? Why would you put that on your back? Its so, so, LARGE! Its in the middle of your back.  Really, what you were thinking?

What was I thinking? I was thinking of progress, and the future, and of hope and of promise. I was for the first time since I had become pregnant with my daughter, branding myself.  I explained the logo and the meaning in this post.

And today, with this photo, I still think it. Many people regret tattoos.  This one I wear with pride. For me, for ehbabes, for marginalized mothers past and present. May we all learn to self define.

9 Thoughts.

  1. I am not a tattoo kind o’ gal. Such a fear of needles that I actually passed out when I got my ears pierced at 23 years old. I don’t understand body decoration in general, especially when taken to excess, which I see a lot. But I do get your Man in the Maze tat. It makes sense. It means something to you and, as your friend, it means something to me. I applaud your courage, not just to have it done, but to show it proudly. XO to you, Suz

    • “I don’t understand body decoration in general”

      I can respect that for I am the reverse – I dont understand NOT decorating the most beautiful canvas we have! Between my hair color, my abundance of jewelry, my tatts, I am all about decorating the body! Yet, in realizing how I am overly, I can totally appreciate the reverse!

  2. Beautiful woman, beautiful photo and beautiful tat! Good for you, Suz! I’m afraid of needles too, even though I’ve always wanted a tattoo. Maybe someday…. but I love yours!

  3. It’s a fabulous photo, Suz – even more so now that I know the significance of it.

  4. That tattoo is so cool. I just read the story that goes with it and now understand the significance. Yes, adoption sure is a maze.

  5. I am so happy to see you standing in Your truth, with an open mind and heart. I think you are very courageous.

    I have read of your journey with much interest. For me, reading your journey, has helped me validate my own journey through adoption and reunion. I have felt less alone in the world, because of the beacon your blog has shown on adoption.

    I have one tattoo, it is in the small of my back. I designed it and had it done to honor and celebrate the decade of my 40s. Your tattoo is fabulous! And this photo of you standing tall, embracing fully you are and enjoying this special moment in your life…well, it totally ROCKS!

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