"We are not born all at once, but by bits. The body first, and the spirit later; and the birth and growth of the spirit, in those who are attentive to their own inner life, are slow and exceedingly painful. Our mothers are racked with the pains of our physical birth; we ourselves suffer the longer pains of our spiritual growth." – Mary Antin
â€œMaaaaahâ€ my youngest son hollered from his bedroom.
â€œWhat?â€ I replied
â€œWe want to give you a hug and a tissâ€ he stated. He still has problems with the K sound.
â€œWell, surely. I have plenty of hugs and tisses for you guys!â€ I said as I entered their room.
â€œWho is first?â€ I inquired.
â€œMe!â€ screamed my excited four year old.
â€œNo. I am firstâ€ said my eldest son â€œOh, wait, no, I am not first. DAUGHTERS NAME is firstâ€.
I was startled. He thinks so much about this stuff and comes out with it when I least expect it. Like at 9 pm on a school night in his darkened bedroom as hugs and tisses are being passed around.
I sat on his brotherâ€™s bed.
â€œYes, she is indeed my first child but you are my first son. And you are the first child Daddy and I had togetherâ€.
â€œYeah, thatâ€™s rightâ€ he says rather solemnly. â€œWill we meet her someday?â€ he asks.
â€œI hope soâ€ I say.
I pause for a second and contemplate dropping the subject. Should I let him talk more or should I go back to doling out those tisses?
He appears lost in thought. Anxious about something. I start kissing his brother. Eldest gets out of his bed and tackles me and in a few moments we are all giggling and laughing and the thought of his birth order and his missing sister has passed.