Let’s Talk Collateral Damage : Siblings

Let us chat first family collateral damage, shall we?

Over the coming days I will post a variety of topics. I would love first mother / first father commentary. Feel free to share with friends as well. If you wish to comment but do not want it public, feel free to email me at bluestokking at gmail dot com.

This is purely for informational and sharing purposes. I am presenting at AAC in a few weeks along with other first mothers and the spouse of a first mother. Our session is titled Mitigating and Managing Collateral Damage: Impact of Adoption on 1st Family.  While I have spoken or emailed with a few of you, I would love to hear from more that might be willing to share. Your commentary will inform my presentation. Your names/emails will not be used in any way. It is purely for additional insight for me to help make our presentation more impactful.

Siblings

Some thoughts and questions for consideration:

Pre Birth Counseling – Prior to surrendering your child to adoption, did any counseling (informed consent) you received cover the impact of adoption on your other children – either those you had at the time or those you parented post surrender?

Reunion Relationships – If you are in reunion and you have parented children, do they have a relationship with your child? If not, why not? Does this vary depending on the gender of the children? If they do have a relationship, how has it gone?

Your Relationship with Parented Children – How has reunion impacted your relationship with your parented children? Were they aware of your surrendered child prior to reunion or did they find out when reunion happened?

Your Parenting Style – How has surrendering your child to adoption impacted the way you parented your subsequent children?

Other –  Anything else you wish to share regarding the impact adoption and/or adoption reunion had on your parented children?

Thank you for your consideration.

Good Adoptee in Cleveland

I will admit up front I know zero about the Adoption Network Cleveland and their conference. A friend whom I respect shared this on her Facebook wall. I am thereby assuming they are a decent org.

Even if they aren’t (honestly), I encourage all in the area to try and see The Good Adoptee which is being performed as part of the Adoption Network Cleveland annual conference. It appears you do not need to register for full conference to see the performance. Double check that, I could be wrong.

I saw this play in NYC (and shamefully, never wrote my thoughts on it, more to come on that) and really enjoyed. I say enjoyed in the sense that I appreciated adoptee Suzanne Bachner excellent playwriting skills and her willingness to share her story. The actress who plays Suzanne is also pretty fabulous.

Trailer for The Good Adoptee below. Find info on the  Adoption Network Cleveland annual conference at their site.

Collateral Damage Conversation

I have spoken to a few of you to discuss how collateral damage of adoption impacted you and your loved ones post surrender. I have not been able to get in touch with all of you. This fact is not due to lack of desire, rather lack of time. I am still interested in hearing from you. I would like to send you a short survey if you are still interested in sharing.

The survey is purely informative (meaning, not scientific, more like an interview) and your name, etc. will not be used unless you give me permission. It is inspirational and motivational for me as I continue to plan our panel discussion for American Adoption Congress.

For a number of reasons I do not want to put the link here. If you are interested, leave a comment with you email (which is not published in comments) and I will send it to you directly.

Thank you for your consideration.

I have spoken to a few of you to discuss how collateral damage of adoption impacted you and your loved ones post surrender. I have not been able to get in touch with all of you. This fact is not due to lack of desire, rather lack of time. I am still interested in hearing from you. I would like to send you a short survey if you are still interested in sharing.

The survey is purely informative (meaning, not scientific) and your name, etc. will not be used unless you give me permission. It is inspirational and motivational for me as I continue to plan our panel discussion for American Adoption Congress.

For a number of reasons I do not want to put the link here. If you are interested, leave a comment with your email (which is not published in comments) and I will send it to you directly.

Thank you for your consideration.