In My Head

"Well behaved women rarely make history" – Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

I think Jenna was in my head today.

"I accept the responsibility for my pregnancy, for not
being strong enough to say, “No, I’m keeping her,” when I was faced
with negativity from my family regarding my financial state and for not
believing in myself enough to realize my potential as a parent. But I
will not take the blame for believing what I was told was the truth and
the whole story. I am not a mind reader. In fact, when I try to guess
at people’s intention, I usually end up making a bigger mess! I am
human. Things I did and decided contributed to the placement. Things
other people did and decided also contributed to the placement.

No human lives in a vacuum. Personal responsibility is
one thing. But when agencies aren’t being held accountable, I’m
wondering where their responsibility lies? Why don’t they have to be
responsible for the truth? Why do I have to take responsibility for
things that were beyond my scope? Why do I have to take responsibility
when I was lied to? Where is that line exactly? I know it’s a gray
line. But when you trust someone and something to be honest with you
and they lie… where is that line of fault? If my Husband cheats on me
and tells me that he is faithful and I believe him… is it my fault when
he leaves me for the other woman?
" Read the full post at the authors site – Chronicles of Munchkinland

Keep on talking, Jenna.  We will change things. We must. We must do it for Munchkin, for my daughter M, for our sons and for the women that will bear their children.

We will do it.

Believe that.

Because with moms like you, and Nic and Claud and others around,  I certainly do.


The Shadow Knows

"Where there is much light, the shadow is deep” – Johann Goethe

I agree it is in very poor taste. I further agree it is likely a hoax or piece of satire. I know people who have done similar things. I don’t approve. In fact, I stopped being friendly with two folks online for their involvement in such things.

Yet for some reason, I could not help but think this site is the shadow of adoption as it exists today.

We find it horrible to think of adopting a child to harvest their organs. 

Yet so many find nothing wrong with adopting a child and harvesting their life.

Yes, their life.

In many adoptions of yesteryear and sadly still today, children are often adopted to be the replacement child. They are adopted by couples who dont have the best interest of the child in mind. They are adopted by couples who have their own interest in mind.

They want a child.They go to great lengths, often illegal, unethical lengths to obtain that child. They erase that childs life, their heritage, the existence of their family. They change their name. They keep the child even when the adoption is proven illegal and they are ordered to return the child by the courts. They dont take an organ from the child. They take the child’s entire life.

Are they the majority? I would like to think not. But the fact that they exist and are allowed to operate as they do should give us all pause just like this site does.

Is using a child for their body parts really that much more horrid than using a childs life to make anothers life whole?

No doubt this hoax is horrific, but look deeper, is it really that different than what already exists in some places today? Or might it be merely a darker shade of the same sacred cow?

Why are we so horrified by it? Becuase it might happen? Or because it is already happening and this site shows it to us in black and white and pretty pictures?

Or does it force us to look at the shadow of adoption. Everything casts a shadow in the right light.  Everything has a dark side. Is this site showing us the dark side? Are folks upset that there is a dark side to adoption? Or are they worried that this may actually happen? And if it does, what are we going to do TODAY to stop it?

MOMS & DADS: Please take this survey

There is a new survey out on the web. It is for mothers or fathers who have relinquished or had their rights terminated.

It is believed that if we get the required numbers of birth parents to take this survey, that this can be the MOST comprehensive online birth parent survey to date.

The sponsors would like to see OVER 600 birth parents take this survey by December 1, 2008.

So if you are an adoptee, sibling or searcher and KNOW of a birth parent who can take this survey, please ask them to do so.

All questions which have a RED * by them are a REQUIRED question. YOU HAVE TO ANSWER THAT QUESTION.

Please go to the link below and take the survey and thank you in advance for your cooperation:

http://www.question id=844922

Roberta MacDonald –
Chairwoman NC Coalition for Adoption Reform
NC State Representative – American Adoption Congress