State of IL Files Suit Against ANLC

I want to comment on this story. I want to comment on it not only because it involves adoption in the State of Illinois. I want to comment on it because I lived it.

The article states that Illinois has filed suit against ANLC for internet advertising. The article cites Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan:

“They’re very specific in directing their advertising and marketing to people in Illinois,” says Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan, even though they’re not licensed in the state. Illinois prohibits for-profit adoption agencies.”

Yes. True. I lived it.

The article also says:

“Adam Pertman of the Donaldson Adoption Institute worries about a coercive approach to pregnant women who may be in crisis, unsure what to do.”

To all this I say YES and YES. I also say HELL EFFIN YES to this last sentence:

“Of course, banning targeted ads in one state won’t keep such online agencies from operating, which is why — if Illinois’ lawsuit succeeds — Pertman hopes other states will follow its lead.”

Let me share, again, in case anyone doubts this can or does happen. I found Easter House in the New Haven, CT yellow pages in 1985. They had an advertisement there, a very misleading advertisement. It suggested they were in CT as they had a CT area code. When my mother and I contacted them we did so with the expectation that they were in CT and that I could stay in CT. We were quite surprised to learn that in fact their CT phone # rolled over to Illinois office. Even when we learned that we were still lead to believe they could assist me in CT. It was not until they flew someone out from Illinois to meet with my mother and me in an abandoned office building we learned otherwise. Even then, what we learned was not true, it was in fact a complete lie constructed to deceive us and get me out of the State of CT. Easter House had an ongoing legal battle with my home state and to get my child out of my body and into the hands of a “forever family” they had to get me out of state. They succeeded. They succeeded by terrorizing my mother and I (well, me really) into believing that if I had my daughter in CT she would be required, by law, to be left in foster care for a year, away from me and not with an adoptive family. I have written about this before. This was a very effective ploy on their part. I clearly remember looking up in terror at my mother, hand on pregnant belly, after having visualized a horrible foster care situation, agreeing that I would go away. In doing so, they isolated me, 1000 miles away from anyone known to me. It was “better for my child” they said.

These predatory practices must stop.

Read more about the Kurtz network of baby brokers.

 

 

 

8 Thoughts.

    • Ah…and now it jumps out at me. Did it hit you as it sounds like it was a good thing or that I am still drinking the koolaid in my writing?

  1. I was tricked in Maryland. I was told that a “certain” adoption agency was handling my adoption, yet as I searched for my son, I found out that it was a private adoption that I did not agree to. There were no records to search. However, my common sense and determined search led me to a serious of lies. When confronted with the truth, I was told to be glad that it was a private adoption or my child would have been placed in foster care. The adopted mom did everything possible to hide the truth.

    • Too many moms were threatened with that foster care stick. Only to find out our kids really ended up in foster care after all. I happen to know the family that fostered my daughter because I helped THEIR adopted daughter find her mother. I remember feeling very very ill when I found out that the foster care was used in my daughters case. I learned far too late that all placements are foster placements for 6 months to a year. I say if we are going to have the adoptive parents “foster” why not let the first mom “foster” her own child for that time period. Ha. Yes. I realize then she would bond and that would make her change her mind. Exactly my point. Longer periods before moms can surrender. Require them to parent for a parent of time. Only then can they truly know what they lose. You certainly dont know when you are signing from the hospital bed, clad in johnny coat (as I was), three days post partum.

  2. Suz, I was never told anything about foster care. As crazy as this sounds, I’m not sure that I was aware that such a thing even existed. Looking back, I was a very naive, gullible and trusting teenager. Ironically, it was my daughter who ended up telling me about foster care. What happened to you, me and millions like us is just so unbelievable.

    • Gail, I completely understand (despite my situation was years later) the naivete, gullible-ness and trust. We believed those that loved us, those that allegedly knew better than us, more educated, more religious, more everything really knew better and had our best interests at heart. It is a rude awakening to learn how we allowed ourselves to be so duped. I don’t know about you but it really shook me to my core when I discovered the lies and made me trust everyone even less.

      I wrote more about this fostering topic in these two older posts.

      Fostering Lies and
      Why Fostering

  3. Oh yes – I definitely felt like you did. While I know that excellent social workers and counselors exist, I have very little trust for these folks in general. I had a recent experience with a counselor here in Illinois that was exceptionally negative and reconfirmed my beliefs. The counselor willingly took my money and didn’t deliver on any of her promises. I felt lied to and duped!

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