Pondering

“When I first began trying to be myself, I at times felt trapped by my feelings. I thought that I was stuck with feelings I had, that I couldn’t change them, and shouldn’t try to even if I could. I saw many negative feelings inside me that I didn’t want, and yet I felt that I must express them if I were going to be myself.

Since then I have realized that my feelings do change and that I can have a hand in changing them. They change simply by my becoming aware of them. When I acknowledge my feelings they become more positive. And they change when I express them.”

Hugh Prather

2 Thoughts.

  1. Wow! That was (is) me. When I was trying to climb out of the adoption denial and fog I lived in for so long. The denial that reunion forced out of me. Even a year later, I am still trapped by my feelings. I thought that I couldn’t change my feelings ~ I survived 30 years by believing & trying to prove that I was the good birthmom. Feeling like I was not my son’s mom, because I didn’t raise him.

    Then I found you, and Cedar, and Cheerio, the other first moms out there in blog land. You wonderful fellow first moms that helped me know it was ok to change my feelings. It was ok to be myself ~ a mom of not 3 children, but 4. A mom to a son that I did not raise.

    Thanks for helping me become aware ~ and for giving me a place to express my feelings too!

    Susie

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